Hazy Shades..............

I haven't staged an Event in weeks. It's not that I didn't have any opportunities. I go out every day, driving around through my corner of Middlesex County. There's always errands to run and, this being December, there was the additional search for presents to buy.

There is always someone.

I can always find someone on their own. Isolated. Alone.

But I just wasn't in the mood. Perhaps that Seasonal Affective Disorder thing really does have an impact on everyone. After all, we haven't had much sunlight lately. Just what Paul Simon called "A Hazy Shade of Winter".

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This morning started as another gray day. But it has the added impact of being New Year's Eve. I didn't have any place in particular to go, but I had to do something so I headed out. I got gas at a Hess Station on Route 9 and stopped at the Post Office in Avenel to mail something.

I had breakfast at the Dunkin' Donuts on St. George Avenue, and decided to head to Metuchen and see if the library was open.

As I drove down Route 27, I noticed that there was very little traffic around, even more so then usual. Just up ahead, I saw this guy - one of those workers who screws up traffic by putting those orange cones way too far out from their vehicles.

I slowed, looking around. I was the only car in the vicinity - except for this guy's. I lowered the passenger side window.

Point, press, Flash.

I drove into Metuchen and found the library open. I picked up a couple of novels - one by Mordecai Richler and one by Philip Roth -  for $.50 each. I've been reading mostly mysteries for the last year or so and these would be a nice change of pace. Perhaps I'd be making a change for the new year after all.

I drove up into South Plainfield, cutting through a parking lot of a local Krauser's so I could bypass a traffic light. As I entered the lot through the back, I saw this guy up ahead.

He was on the passenger side, so I lowered that window again. A quick look around. No one else.

Point, press, Flash.

I continued on.

I pulled into the strip mall where Unique is. That's the thrift store I like to stop at from time to time. I've picked up coats for $6, jeans for $4, and other stuff. Mondays they discount everything by another 25%. On an impulse, I drove around the back. I'm guessing that this guy just picked up the bike and was trying it out.

I thought about it. There was no one else around. But the pick up area for the large pieces (furniture, etc.) from Unique was here and someone could show up at any time. And anyway, the guy seemed to be having a good time.

I didn't stop. I drove home.

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Now I'm sitting on my bed, propped up against the head board. The TV is on, and my laptop is where the name suggests. I can look out the window and watch the traffic pass by on Rahway Avenue, as well as anyone going in or out of my building. The sky is still gray, but - I think - my mood has changed.

When I was younger, things were always black and white. There was a right reason for doing something, and a wrong one. Now............I'm not so sure. Now, just having a reason seems to be justification enough.

I look out the window and it's getting dark. But we've passed the winter solstice, so it's getting darker later. Maybe that's all we can hope for.

That it keeps taking longer for the darkness to come in.

Maybe hazy shades aren't so bad after all.

Two Days.........

We've had a string of dreary looking days lately. Last week, that sort of fit my mood as I had the last two tests for my yearly check-up. Wednesday, I had a left heart catheterization - which involved going in through the femoral artery in my groin and using a dye to check out the heart chambers. That went well, but you have to stay on your back for hours until they decide that the incision has closed. I was dropped off at 5 o'clock in the morning and didn't get picked up until 2:30 in the afternoon. At least I knew that everything was good.

On Thursday, I had a CT scan done, because there was a spot on a chest x-ray and they wanted a better image. That process is very quick. In at 8, and out at 8:30. But you don't get an answer right away. I was back to waiting, again.
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Yesterday, the weather changed. The sun cam out and the temperature rose. It was a day to be out and about. Feeling good, I started the morning by driving through Sewarren. In this section of Woodbridge, there aren't many sidewalks. Heading down to the bay, I saw this older man coming towards me.

I had already lowered the windows to take advantage of the warmth. I looked around as we closed the gap. There was no one else around.

Point, press, Flash.

I swung back through Woodbridge Proper and drove into the Fords section of the township. There are a few strip malls here, some of them with empty stores. I drove through a few until I saw this one guy.

Most of the stores here had failed, so there wasn't anyone around. I slowed and watched, but the guy was just standing there. I passed him.

Point, press, Flash.

I continued on through Fords, down through Edison, and around into Iselin. The speed limit here is 25, so moving slowly doesn't attract attention. There are sidewalks here, and I came across this guy after a few minutes.

Maybe he was out for some exercise, I don't know, but he was moving at a good clip. I barely had enough time to verify that we were alone.

Point, press, Flash.

I drove on through Colonia, back into Woodbridge Proper, did some food shopping, and went home.

Later that afternoon I got a phone call. The results of the CT scan were in, and everything was fine. There was nothing further that needed to be done. I'm good for another year.

Then I thought about Gordon. Here I am with several doctor's - and their support staffs - making sure that I'm good to go, and somewhere out there Gordon was on his own. At least I could check up on him.
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This morning started out gray, but the sun broke through pretty quickly. When I left my apartment, I made sure that the bedroom windows were open.

This was the signal that we'd agreed upon. I was hoping that Gordon would see it.

I had some errands to run, and I stopped at a few libraries. It was another nice day for a drive, but I wasn't inclined to stage any Events.

I got back around 11:30. The bedroom windows were closed. I went in.

Gordon was sitting on the couch. He didn't look any worse then when I'd last seen him, but he hadn't looked all that good back then.

"Denny. I'm glad you signaled. I've been meaning to get in touch with you myself." He didn't stand. He didn't offer to shake hands. But he did smile.
"Hi, Art. I was hoping you'd see it." I put down the bags I was carrying. "So, how're you doing?"
"Ah, I thought that might be what was on your mind. I've noticed that you've had some doctor's visits recently, and I was pretty sure that they were due to your transplant anniversary. I'd guess that all is well, and you started feeling...what..concern?...for my well being."
"Yeah, I guess. But I do know that your out there on your own, and it can't be easy. And it's not just your heart, but..for instance..what did you do during that hurricane? Doyle said they couldn't tell if you were active then and I didn't know where you were."

He sat for a few minutes, just looking at me, which made me a little uncomfortable. Finally, he nodded.
"Although I don't have access to medical professionals, Denny, I am not alone. I have a friend who has been helping me. I stayed with him during the storm, and he keeps tabs on some things for me. In fact, do you remember that I said I was going to send you a package?"
I nodded.
"Good. Well, I thought better of it. You don't need to have the package right now. But when the time comes, my friend will send it to you. You'll know what to do with it then."

It was my turn to look at him. I realized that he wasn't as helpless as I thought.
I told him that. He just smiled. Then he stood, slowly.

"No, I'm not as helpless as you thought. But I don't have a lot of time to do what needs to be done."
"What needs to be done, Art?"
He just grinned again.
"It's time for me to be going. It was good to see you, Denny. Hopefully, we'll be able to meet again."

He left, closing the door behind him.

A lot can happen in two days.