Surprise, Surprise.....

Doyle called on Tuesday. We met yesterday at the Barnes & Noble outside the Menlo Park Mall. He was sitting at a table by the front window off the parking lot, and shot me with a "hand" gun as I crossed from my car. He was having a cup of coffee (I guess) and some sort of danish. He had another cup for me.

"Decaf, just a little milk, and one Equal." He said.
"How'd you know?"
"We monitor you very closely. I told you that. We know a lot about your habits, and different tastes in foods and the like."
"O, OK, so what's this about?"
"I wanted to check in with you, since I missed our last meeting."
Right, you were sick, or so Givings said. How're you feeling?"
"Better, but I'm still a little weak. Don't know if I could run more then 3 miles or so."
"Yeah, right. I'm guessing you wouldn't have any problems."
"Anyway, the People Upstairs had something they wanted me to tell you, and I wanted to see if you had any questions from your meeting with Givings the last time."
"Yeah. I have questions. Givings couldn't answer them, and I doubt you can, too, but I'll ask anyway. What happens when this is all over? Will it matter if I do or don't make the 12?"
"To be honest...I don't know. The People Upstairs never said, and I never asked. I find that it's better not to ask any questions at all. Do what they want and everything runs smoothly. They don't often ask for anything too difficult."
"What do you mean.."too difficult"?"
"Nothing. Don't worry about it. It doesn't apply to you. Besides, there's some good news."
"Oh yeah? What?"
"Remember that I told you that the 6 months began when I first approached you? That was on August 18th, so the end date would be February 18th, right?"
"I'm aware of that. So?"
"That's 3 weeks from today, right?"
"Again, so?"
"Well, you still have 3 more Events to take care of. So, the People Upstairs have decided to give you until the end of February. That gives you another week to 10 days."
"Yippee. I still don't know if I can finish this. It's not so easy in this weather."
"No, but so far you've been treating Random Events as if you can't plan for them."
"What are you talking about?"
"Well, just because it's supposed to be random doesn't mean you can't be ready for it. Lets say that you go to a particular place once a week. Someone would know that, if they'd been watching you. If you were to be the subject of an Event, someone could wait along whatever route you take to get there and, depending on the traffic in the area, stage the Event. Do you understand what I'm saying here?"

I sat there for a moment, thinking. The coffee was probably cold by now. I knew what he was alluding to, and said so.

"Good. Now that you understand, you should never mention to anyone that I told you this. It should look like you figured it out on your own. I've told you of the leeway that the People Upstairs are allowing, so it's time for me to go."

He had finished his danish, and drank the rest of his coffee as he stood up.

"Why did you tell me that?"
"You're carrying around my friends heart, and he deserves to get every break he can. Besides, removing the tracker and getting someone else would be a pain in the ass."

He walked away, and I sat there a while longer. There was a lot to think about, and plan for.

Number 9..Number 9..

I don't know if I've mentioned this, but I have a lot of free time now. After the transplant, I couldn't return to work so I'm living on Social Security Disability. It covers the basics, but not much else.

Now, one of my hobbies that I'm still allowed (I can't smoke or drink anymore) is to read. After I got out of the hospital, I took to walking to the local library. I don't like to borrow books. I like to own them. I found out that the library puts books it no longer needs (usually because they wound up with more copies then they need) on sale - $.50 per paperback, $1 to $4 bucks for hardcovers. I went there maybe once every week or so.

Once I got my car, I expanded my library hunt and I'm now up to 4 in Woodbridge, 3 in Edison, 1 in Metuchen, 1 in Hazlet, and 1 in Shrewsbury. I hit Hazlet and Shrewsbury maybe once a month, and 2 of the Edison ones about as often. They don't really stock much for sale. The prices vary, and I've picked up hardcovers for as little as $.50. The drawback to this is that if I see a book I'd like to read, I have to buy it then, since there's no guarantee that it will be there the next time I come through. I've got approximately 100books piled up in my back room just waiting to be read, and I'm reading 2 at a time usually.

The day before yesterday, Wednesday, I was up early and decided to drive over to the main library in Edison. It opens at 9:30 as opposed to the others I visit which open at 10. It was a bright, sunny day, and as I pulled in to the parking lot I noticed an older man unloading boxes from a panel truck with the Edison library logo on it. New arrivals, I guessed, though there were quite a few boxes. Maybe supplies. I went in to check the sale racks. Nothing I was interested in.

When I came out, the older man was just ahead of me, and sat down on the floor in the back of the truck to take a break. I got into my car, and started the engine.

This library requires that you turn off your cell phone when you go in. I'd turned mine to vibrate, and was in the process of turning it back when I realized there was no one around. Just me and the old man in the back of the truck. Because of the way his back doors were open, he couldn't be seen unless you were directly in front of him. I took the Flasher from my back pocket, and moved the car out of the spot and towards the exit. As I came abreast of him I lowered the driver side window. I still didn't see anyone and there were no cars entering or exiting. The way the lot is situated, it's down a hill from the main road, behind the library, and there are no windows in the back overlooking it.

Point, push, Flash, and I drove up the hill, turned onto the access road, and headed toward Route 27. I had seen the old man droop over as I raised the window.

I didn't get a confirmation until I realized that I hadn't finished taking the phone out of vibrate mode. I debated going to the Metuchen library, but changed my mind and headed home. 3 more, and about 4 weeks to do it.

More Misgivings........

Doyle didn't call. Instead, I met Ms. Givings at the Menlo Park Mall yesterday. She picked the entrance beside where the movie theater is. No "Hello", "Happy Holidays", "Happy New Year", or "How are you?", just a curt "Walk with me." as she hustled by. At least she slowed it down as she rounded the corner towards Macy's. After all, the only people at the mall at this time of day are the "Mall Walkers" - those senior citizens/recuperating people who need to be walking(and those physical fitness freaks who don't have jobs). If we kept moving at her initial pace, we'd stick out like sore thumbs.

"Where's Doyle?" I asked, to try to kick things off.
"He's got the flu, or something. They pulled me in off my vacation to babysit you."
"What do you mean, babysit? I thought you monitored me by the implant."
"You gotta know you're under constant watch. Besides the monitoring, the People Upstairs want a constant watch on you now. They're concerned that you haven't had an Event in a few weeks."
"Look, they were the ones, at least Doyle said they were, who said things would slow up with the cold weather. No one's out and about, and very few by themselves. Also, it's the holiday season. The only people you see are in crowds."
"I know that, but the People Upstairs play the tune we all dance to. Anyway, they wanted someone to speak to you, in case you were having second thoughts or something."
"Not me. You and Doyle scared those out of me the last time we met. I'll finish this, or at least get as close as I can to the target number. By the way, what happens if I don't get the twelve? I know I've got 8 done, and a little less then 2 months for the other 4, but what happens if I don't bring them all in?"
"I'm not sure. No one's ever said anything about it. I do know that they originally didn't think you'd come anywhere near the target. As you got closer, they began to rethink the project, and then they got concerned that you were getting sloppy or too personal with numbers 5 and 6. Right now, I have no idea what they intend to do."
"OK. So, you're just here to make sure I don't have a bout of seasonal remorse? That I'm not depressed, or suicidal? Is that it?"
"Partly. And I can tell by your tone of voice that you're not. The People Upstairs will be glad to hear that. But also, I'm reiterating the fact that I'm Doyle's backup and you'll have me to deal with periodically when he's not available."
"well, if that's all, consider it done. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to stop and get something to eat. These early morning meetings throw my meal schedule out of whack."
"Just one more thing. The People Upstairs want to know what you plan to do once this project is over."
"What? Are you kidding? I haven't planned that far ahead. I try not to think about this whole situation at all. I take it day by day, do what I have to, and move on. As long as you have this monitor in me, I don't see that I have too much of a choice. Maybe that's what I want, to have the monitor taken out. Tell them that."
"I will. Is there anything else?"
"Do you think they will? Take out the implant, I mean?"
"I don't know." She stopped walking, and for the first time today, looked my straight in the face. "They may, and they may not. I don't know them. I've seen them by good guys, and I've seen them do some rotten things all in the name of National Security. I couldn't even guess what they'd do."
She paused, and looked around not really noticing anything, just gathering her thoughts.
"Look, I don't know you. I don't want to know you. I think Doyle has made this project a personal one for him. That's his mistake. I won't do that. But I will give you some advise. Do what they want you to. No more, no less. You try you best, and they won't think your slacking so they won't try to take it out on you. Whatever happens after that is their doing. That's all I can offer you."
She pause again, as if waiting for me to reply, but I couldn't think of anything to say.
"I'll tell them that you still working towards the final goal, and that the slow down was as they predicted - weather related. Beyond that, I won't tell them anything about this conversation. Hopefully, Doyle will be feeling better the next time they want to talk to you."
She turned and left. Suddenly that appetite I'd had wasn't as pressing as it had been.
I now had more to worry about.

8 Days a Week.....

This time of year, you can't count on the weather. Some days are cold, some days are colder, and for some inexplicable reason some days are much, much warmer. Last Wednesday was one of those much warmer days.

It had rained very heavily the night before but the morning dawned bright and warm. (I'm assuming it dawned that way since it was bright and warm when I got up several hours later.) Listening to the radio, it was already in the upper 60's, but would get progressively cooler during the afternoon. I decided it would be a good day for a walk.

Lately, I've put on a few pounds. To me, it's noticeable but others seem to think I was too thin to start with. I blame it having the car, and being inherently lazy. Anyway, I decided to walk up to Perkins for breakfast, stop at ShopRite for some stuff, maybe hit the library, and go home. I should be out most of the morning.

The walk takes me up Rahway, along Freeman, and out onto Amboy (which becomes St. George at some arbitrary point). I was enjoying it. The air was warm, the sun was out, and everything just seemed to be brighter. Coming out on to Amboy, I crossed to the other side and walked up passed A & P and ShopRite. Just passed ShopRite there's a new bank and the recently reconfigured turn off from Routes 1 & 9 North. This turn off wraps around the store and parking lot for Animals & Things, which sits in sort of a bowl because of the way the turn off was built.

As I passed the bank, I saw a huge amount of pigeons in the parking lot for Animals & Things. A HUGE AMOUNT OF PIGEONS! It was like an army of flying , diseased rats, and they were all facing in the same direction, Animals & Things. It looked like they had planned an attack and were waiting for the word to start.

I stopped, not wanting to move too quickly forward, in case I set them off. Just then, I saw someone come out of the back of the store. He was carrying a large box. A shudder went through the pigeons, but they stayed where they were. He walked right into the middle of them, and began to spread around what I presumed to be bird seed or something, which he took from the box. He was feeding this army of scavengers!!! This wouldn't do.

With great power comes great responsibility. I circled back, and around the bank, coming up on the parking lot from the far side. The man paid not attention to me (nor did the pigeons) and continued to throw around the food. I took the Flasher out. Closer. Closer. No one paid me any attention, and the way the turn off came around, we couldn't be seen from either the highway of Amboy/St. George.

Point, press, flash. I turned around quickly, and without running, moved as fast as I could towards the bank. I circled around, and approached the lot from the street side again. The pigeons continued to eat around the man, many of them in the box which had fallen on to the ground with him.

"Enjoy it while you can." I thought, "Since it's the last meal you'll get around here."

I was in a good mood as I continued my walk, although I figured on coming back on the other side of the street. I didn't care if I got a confirm on this one (although I did) because I felt I'd done the world a favor.

Giving Thanks.....

Usually, my not having ready access to a computer annoys me, and slows down the postings to this blog. In this instance, it gave me time to figure out how I wanted to say something. Even with the extra time, I couldn't so I'll just go ahead with what I want to say.

Thanksgiving Day is always the last Thursday in November. That should be no surprise to anyone. This year it was preceded by 3 days that have a big impact on me. The Tuesday was the first anniversary of my transplant. A big day for me and my immediate family. A quiet celebration to remember what happened and to be thankful for what didn't.

This means that Monday was the first anniversary of the death of my donor, Jimmy. I can't imagine how his family feels, or what they went through making the decision to donate the organs of their only son. I called them. They said it was getting better, but the tone of voice they used didn't sound that way.

Wednesday would've been my donor's 27th birthday. Another blow to the family.

For me, these 3 days will be linked forever to my future. I guess with every good thing that happens to you, you have to be prepared to carry some sadness.

This Old Man He Played 7.........

This last weekend was great. Spent a lot of time with my daughter. She picked me up early Saturday morning and we drove to D. C. for the American Heart Association Heart Walk on the Mall. We were together for about 12 hours, 8 in the car, 1 at a late lunch, and 3 doing the walk. It was a little tiring, but we covered 4 miles, and her sponsors got their money's worth. Sunday, we hooked up after the football game for an early supper so I could give her something I'd picked up that morning. (I'm guessing 3 o'clock is the demarcation point for late lunch/early supper.) The weather was overcast both days, but somewhat warmish, which was actually the best to hope for doing the walk. Kinda like what you'd want doing a marathon, I guess.

Monday was a beautiful, Fall day. Sunny, unseasonably warm. I drove around a lot, doing a library run. (I've found that a lot of libraries sell books that are donated, usually because they already have a copy or two. This is because they have a finite amount of space. As a rule, they price them at 50 cents for paperbacks and 41 to $3 bucks for hardcovers. I usually stick with the paperbacks. Must have about 100 at home that I haven't got to yet.)

Decided to drive to Avenel, and drop off something at a friends house that I'd picked up that morning. I turned off St. George Avenue by the Dunkin Donuts and figured on going straight up to Remsen. At the corned of Prospect, I saw an old person raking leaves. I say person because I couldn't make out the gender. The baggy clothes and fly-away white hair could've been anybody. I noticed that there was no one around. I continued to Remsen and turned left onto Butler, parking just off the corner. This is a quiet neighborhood, with very little activity on a weekday, mostly workers busy doing their business elsewhere.

I walked down Butler, and turned up Prospect. It's a pretty steep hill from there. I took out the Flasher. I stayed on the right-hand side of the street, since the person I saw would be on the left. I kept looking around, but I saw no foot or vehicular traffic. As I got to the corner, I saw the person still raking. His/her back was to me, but that doesn't really matter. They must've been in their late 80's or 90's from the impression I got. I crossed the street. No one around. Point, push, Flash, and they toppled gently into a pile of leaves as I rounded the corner.

I walked up the block, down Remsen, got in my car, and continued to my friends house to drop off the item. I was driving down Amboy Avenue 15 minutes later when I got the confirmation. 7 inside 3 months. I was slightly ahead of schedule.

Misgivings......

Doyle called last Saturday, wanting to meet. It had been almost a week since Event 6, but I really don't have any choice in these matters. We met Sunday at Alvin Williams Park in Sewarren, which overlooks the Arthur Kill.

As I walked down from the parking lot to the water front, I saw he was sitting on a bench with someone else - a woman. He was watching for me, and rose as I got close.

"Denny, thanks for coming. This is Fran Givings. She's an agent like me." She held out her hand, and I shook it.

"What's this about? I thought this was supposed to be low key, just the 2 of us?"
"It is, only the People Upstairs changed the rules a little. Fran will be my backup. If you hear from her, you gotta do what you'd do if you heard from me. Got it?"
"OK. But why? Are they sending you somewhere else?"
"No, nothing like that." He started to walk, and we trailed along with him. So far, Miss Givings hadn't said a word. "The People Upstairs are starting to take this seriously. not that they hadn't before but they weren't optimistic that you'd get the 12 in 6 months. Now that you've done 6 in 3, they starting to pay more attention, and everything has to now be by the book. That's where Fran comes in."
"I'm still not following."
"It's easy. You see, every operation usually requires that the agent running it have a backup. That way, in case something happens to him - or her, sorry Givings - the backup can step in without missing a beat. Of course, this means that I have to keep Fran here in the loop on everything, but you don't have to do anything. If she steps in it's because I'm unavailable, for whatever reason. But, she shouldn't have to since this is all random after all, and you make the choices. I only call if there's something you need to know. OK?"
"All right, yeah, I guess it makes sense. So what you're saying is I got 6 more to do, 3 months to do it in, and Agent Givings may call sometime but probably not."
"Right. That's it." Givings nudged him in the ribs, but tried to hide it from me. She didn't do such a good job. "Oh Yeah, there is one more thing."
"There always is. What is it?"
"Again, it's the People Upstairs. They're happy with the end results, but not so much with the last 2 Events. The thinking is that they were too out in the open, too public. They want to make sure that you understand that they'll keep their end of the bargain, bailing you out if you get caught. But, they want you to keep it low key. They're afraid you're getting too cocky, and maybe a little too careless. Don't forget what's at stake here."
"I don't, believe me. I know it's a 'me or them' situation."
"Good. Then that's all we need to hear." Turning to Givings, he said,"You can wait for me in the car now, Fran. If he says anything meaningful, I'll let you know." She said nothing - still - and turned toward the parking lot and the kind of car you'd expect government workers to be driving in. "OK. She's gone now. What were you thinking with that last one?"
"What?"
"That last one, number 6. I understand the thinking behind number 5, she was an available target and the situation just happened -even though the People Upstairs are still a little uncomfortable with it - but I don't get 6."
We walked along quietly for a while. He didn't push, and I was sunk in thought. Finally, I explained it. How it happened and why. He was still quiet for a while, and we passed a marker that indicated it was 8 tenths of a mile if you followed the outside trail around the entire park. I wondered how far we'd come.
"OK. I think I get it, and you gotta stop thinking like that right now. You are not some caped-crusading vigilante taking out the scum of the earth. We don't normally do any background checks on the people involved in these Events, but we could. What if we found that this guy was just some poor,dumb schmuck who was drinking a cup of coffee while his family was in the Children's Room enjoying reading time? Maybe he slipped out for a cigarette. You can't create back stories for them. They can't exist in your mind, they can't be real. Otherwise, you make yourself crazy, and I do mean crazy. You get me?"

I shrugged, because I didn't know what to say. We walked some more, and stopped back at the bench where he'd been sitting earlier with Givings. I stared at the Outerbridge for a while, I don't know how long. Doyle just stood there, saying nothing.

"I get it, I guess. I just thought that I was making something right out of this. That there was a purpose, a valid reason for it."
"There isn't. You know it, I know it, and the People Upstairs know it." He stopped, as if he wanted to say more, then took a deep breathe, exhaled, and continued. "Look, there's something you should know. The People Upstairs almost pulled the plug on you. They like the project now, but they're unsure of you. I convinced them otherwise, in the only language they really understand. It wouldn't be cost effective to stop you now. You have the implant. They'd have to take an agent out of the field, who's already got the implant, but then they're using a traceable asset should something go wrong, or they'd have to create someone, which has a whole bunch of other problems. For better or worse, they understand they're stuck with you. But, and it's a big But, they can pull the plug at any time. You need to keep that in mind. I don't know what they'd do to you if they decide to go that route, but you know too much to let them be comfortable with you just walking away. Be careful, is all I'm saying."
" I got it. I never thought about it like that, but I see where you're coming from. Let me ask you something. If they decide to get rid of me, would you do it?"
"I work for them. It's my job. And even if I refused, they have agents like Givings to do whatever they want. I'd like to think I'd be a little more discrete, and at least act on your behalf."

We didn't say anything else. There was nothing left to say. We'd go back to how it was before, but I'd be a little more cautious now. After all, there was Miss Givings.